I am not ok.
We are all made up of a mind, body and spirit. When one gets broken, the others can be a part of what helps lift a person back up again. But when all three come under pressure, sustained and prolonged pressure, then break all at once…like Humpty Dumpty it seems impossible that the mind, body and spirit can be put back together again.
I’m in that place right now. And while I know it’s ok to not be ok, I’m currently getting the help I need to get out of it. But in between appointments, and specialists and treatment and medication, there are things I have to take responsibility for and begin to change in order to be whole again.
Today is the annual VHI Women’s Mini-Marathon – a 10k race taking place on the streets of Dublin. For the past 3 years I’ve run this 10k, raising money for charity and challenging myself to PB in the process.
This year, I’m ignoring it. I’m not running it and I’m not even going to go cheer at it.
I was supposed to run the Dublin City Marathon Half yesterday. I didn’t due to injury; but my beautiful balloon did.
Sometimes, I compare myself to others and spiral into negative thoughts about myself. Here’s how I get out of it!
Shall I compare thee?
In 10 days time I’ll be running my first 10 mile race. the Frank Duffy 10 mile, part of the Dublin City Marathon Race Series. It’s also the longest race I’ll be running since I began Project Speedy. I know how 41 weeks of training in my legs.
Has it really been that long? When I decided to concentrate on speedwork training, last November, I wanted to give myself at least a year to conquer my goals. 41 weeks later and here I am. Boy, does time ever fly when you’re having fun
Last year the Rock ‘n Roll Half Marathon here in Dublin was my first ever half marathon. This year, it was my first time volunteering at a race. It was a fantastic experience and more than anything it really opened my eyes to what it takes to put on a race. As a runner, and racer myself, the day gave me a whole new appreciation for race organizers and volunteers.